O.o

lol, do you guys still read this? O_o

insomnia

I can't sleep :( It's 4 something a.m. and I'm still not tired. I tried reading to make my eyes tired but that didn't work. Augh.

Summer is flying by much too fast. When I first came back to America I really wanted to head straight off to Boston, but now I'm freaking out that it's already August.

My mom told me today that I should be looking NOW for a full-time job. That was a downer like no other. Senior year hasn't even started :( I am very much not ready to join the workforce of America, although I feel like I never will be.

It's going to start getting light out in about an hour, and I thought about driving to the beach to watch the sunrise, but I think I'm actually getting sleepy now. Finally!! So good night. (Or good morning...?)

helloooo everyone!

i miss you all, but you don't miss me.

XOXO,
-the blog.

Publicolor!

So Publicolor, the nonprofit organization I told some of you about and that Susana linked me to (yay thanks!) (www.publicolor.org) finally contacted me back saying they might have me come in tomorrow. In lieu of that, I browsed around their site and did some research, just to make sure I'm on the same page as them, and so that I can have a better idea of what they want me to capture (AHA PUN!)

So the way I understand it, Publicolor is a two-fold program. One part is to engage disaffected/at-risk students and children by involving them in an outlet to express themselves; in this case, it is to paint public institutions such as schools. They teach them the process of commercial painting, so if anything, they'll have a marketable skillset in the future. The second part is the actual result of the painting - Publicolor was founded by Ruth Lande Shuman studied the effects that color had on the learning processes of children, and that warmer colors in a building gave energy. Publicolor itself has heard testimonies from the schools they helped paint: one school is quoted as witnessing student violence rates go down a lot ever since the school was repainted.

From what I gather about Publicolor, these are probably the things I'll focus (AHA PUN!) on tomorrow:

• Focusing on the camp directors teaching the children how to paint
• The stark before/after results
• The safe environment that Publicolor provides (smiley kids!)
• Sometimes they have volunteers that range from community leaders to corporate executes paint alongside these children as a way for them to connect / have a role model - if one happens to show up tomorrow, definitely gotta capture this!

And that is all for now.

In other news, I'm leaving for Asia July 9th - 26th; seems like I go every year lol. LETS ALL HANG OUT.

Obligatory picture

WATCH ME FLY MOM!

I MISS YOU GUYS!

yum yum sausages... (omg i almost forgot how to spell that)

anyway, feeling lazy... at work. writing my stupid novel that no one reads :( ah. mousse by jello is surprisingly good but un-fulfilling. i feel like i need to eat five of them (ok mb three) to get that intense chocolatey flavor. perhaps i should upgrade to dark chocolate.

can't wait to fall to see ya'lls! (or july teheheheh).

i'm almost done with a rough sketch of megaman for kevin. it looks ok. i'm afraid coloring it will ruin everything. sigh, expensive 5$ per piece copic markers here i come...

so hope your fourth was great! i contributed to american patriotism by painting my finger nails blue and my toes red, although purely a coincidence.

mb i should get back to work. feel free to ignore this rambling post =\

peace + <3,
-Mofei.

p.s. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c_rUbqbhUEQ

t-minus three days

I finished my final an hour and a half ago but I'm still stranded inside the business building because it's pouring outside and I don't have my umbrella. I'm so hungry!! There's a cafe here but I want to go home and make a quesadilla. Blargh. And I really need to go home so I can do laundry because I'm wearing my last pair of underwear. (Too much info, you say? Ah well, too late.) It's also probably about time to change out of my pajama shirt. (I woke up early this morning and decided that it was still a prime pajama-wearing hour.) I had to do some last minute studying because last night I realized I had absolutely no idea what one of our lecture topics meant. I was looking at the slides and they just made no sense to me. We spent an entire lecture on it...I vaguely recall being there but who knows what I was actually doing during class...? Anyway, good thing I studied up on that this morning, because it came up on the exam!

Lots of goodbyes recently, more tonight, and more this weekend. I think the finality of this whole thing is slowly and surely sinking in, and it's kind of depressing. I mean, it'll be nice to see everyone back home again, but I'm not ready to leave yet. I love everything about this country...the people, the places, the sky, the water, the stars... everything in nature is somehow more beautiful here. Or maybe that's because I never really found the time to step back and appreciate all that back home? I guess I'll find out when I go back and view it all again with a fresh perspective.

See you soon <3

summer? summer?!

summer has been interesting. and when i mean interesting i mean textbook boring but very interesting to me. after i came home i studied for my MCAT and then after the test i decided to take a break that has now extended into a super long one month break. during the break, i would look for a job but couldn't find anything because for some reason im having a really hard time figuring out what i want to do. these last few weeks i realized that when im at school i operate like a bullet train just moving towards an end destination and a lot of what i do i just do to make the wheels turn so i do all this stuff without really thinking about what im doing and why im doing it. maybe im just trying to keep myself busy so i think im doing work.

after my MCAT i just felt so burnt out. so tired of working all the time and feeling like i had so many demands to meet. i think ive been focused on working hard and giving effort which of course counts but i also need to learn how to work smarter so there is a little more effortful production on my part. this is something im going to work on next year, starting now? and hopefully i wont feel as burnt out anymore.

i think all this self reflection actually came from working on my med school app and trying to look for a job. this summer i couldnt decide on a job because i was and still am so worried about how it might affect my admissions to medical school. i originally wanted to do something fun this summer but i worry because this is the last summer before i apply to medical school so i wanted to do something that will count and something that will be phenom for my app but i havent thought of any that i really want to do, that i feel wont be like what ive done before yet ill also like. and then i get stuck not sure about what to do again. and then i begin to worry about whether or not im ready for medical school. should i be applying? is being a doctor the right thing for me? gahhhhhh and now im back to square one. maybe i just need to stop thinking. go out some more.

but no worries ;) i promise my entire summer wont be like this im just going through a little phase. all this thinking also gets me thinking about how its our last year :O i want to do tons of amazing things next year you guys heard?!?!!!

miss you guys. i know it's only the end of june but i kind of miss school already and can't wait for us to all live near each other and all that jazz! i hope youre all having FANTASMIC summers!